One More Time
It has been 5 years since I played my last football game as a McKinney Lion. That's a fact. Another fact is that in two days, I play my final game in Notre Dame Stadium as a part of the Notre Dame Fighting Irish football team. While the reality of that statement still escapes me, I felt that tonight would be a good night to open up with a few emotions that have been hitting me lately.
First off, the wound of my dad's passing is being rehashed a little bit. My father was the one who pleaded with me to just tryout when I reached High School. He asked me to give it just one chance, and from that first practice, I loved football and all the things it placed in my path. He's the human being responsible, the one God used to bring me to where I am today through the sport. It burns a little bit that he isn't here to see the final chapter of my career take place. On top of that, I am going to stand in front of thousands of people tomorrow night for a picture with my mom. That's not bad, but we were supposed to do it as a family last year, but we decided against it, because we still had one more year to do it. Man, that stings. But still we'll stand. Oh, you better believe we'll stand. If for nothing else than a testimony to the power that comes from a life filled with Christ, we will stand together.
Secondly, I'm feeling really old. This year has been tough at ND for me, because I don't know anyone on campus. I mean last year, even with me off campus, I had several classmates who I could spot in the seats at the Pep Rally or in the student section after the game. Now, I look into those seats and I see a group of people that won't even say hello to me as I walk through campus. Not because they don't care, but because I've already graduated. My peers are out there working, and I'm postponing life.
The third emotion I feel is much happier than the previous two. I feel overcome by a spirit of joy. From where I've been, to what I've seen, and who I've come across in the process of it all, I rejoice that God has had His hand on my shoulder every step of this path less traveled. I can't wake up in the morning without thanking my Heavenly Father for lighting up one more step in front of me so that I may know which way to go. I'm thankful for His Grace and Mercy that I see everyday in my life. I also rejoice in the relationships I've found along the way. From friendships, to a brotherhood, to everything else, I feel so blessed that I've been brought here, to NW Indiana, to come into the lives of those around me. For as I've passed through the campuses of Bethel and Notre Dame, and as I've rooted myself in at Grace Church of Granger, every relationship has left me with something that I'd not had before. I am truly a changed man, and I will be different tomorrow than I am as I write now.
The final emotion I want to mention is the longest to explain. As I sit here at my table, working on my laptop, listening to David Crowder, I am flooded with anticipation. Not just a little bit. I'm FLOODED!!! Now, that seems pretty obvious that I'd be anticipating our game on Saturday, but it's so much more than this game. The realization that I won't put on that Blue Jersey again has me anticipating everything from the last few games to starting school again, finding love, and living life! I mean, come on! The end of this chapter could be the sweetest ending I've ever read. But more than that, it could be the most exciting start to a chapter ever written. Why? Because from here, where do we go? Myself, I'll be in the Bend for at least six months, working at Grace, but that could turn into a long-term thing (please God?). In step with that, I'll be going back to seminary here sometime, either part time or full time, depending on the work situation. In the midst of all of this, I feel God preparing me for a relationship again. Not trying to seek or anything, but I feel my heart being strengthened and convicted in areas that haven't been addressed in a long time (Jokingly, I'm not thrilled...I'll explain another day). God's got something in store for me, and the end of this chapter of my life is causing me to face up to just how BIG it could be. Oh man, I'm jacked up. God, I give you all I am. Take me and use me how you see fit.
Sorry for getting off on that tangent, but seriously, get excited! Maybe you're in the middle of a chapter with life right now, but God still has some awesome stuff planned. Tune in! Okay, gonna wipe the tears and clean the apartment.
Feel the Flood,
Bobby
First off, the wound of my dad's passing is being rehashed a little bit. My father was the one who pleaded with me to just tryout when I reached High School. He asked me to give it just one chance, and from that first practice, I loved football and all the things it placed in my path. He's the human being responsible, the one God used to bring me to where I am today through the sport. It burns a little bit that he isn't here to see the final chapter of my career take place. On top of that, I am going to stand in front of thousands of people tomorrow night for a picture with my mom. That's not bad, but we were supposed to do it as a family last year, but we decided against it, because we still had one more year to do it. Man, that stings. But still we'll stand. Oh, you better believe we'll stand. If for nothing else than a testimony to the power that comes from a life filled with Christ, we will stand together.
Secondly, I'm feeling really old. This year has been tough at ND for me, because I don't know anyone on campus. I mean last year, even with me off campus, I had several classmates who I could spot in the seats at the Pep Rally or in the student section after the game. Now, I look into those seats and I see a group of people that won't even say hello to me as I walk through campus. Not because they don't care, but because I've already graduated. My peers are out there working, and I'm postponing life.
The third emotion I feel is much happier than the previous two. I feel overcome by a spirit of joy. From where I've been, to what I've seen, and who I've come across in the process of it all, I rejoice that God has had His hand on my shoulder every step of this path less traveled. I can't wake up in the morning without thanking my Heavenly Father for lighting up one more step in front of me so that I may know which way to go. I'm thankful for His Grace and Mercy that I see everyday in my life. I also rejoice in the relationships I've found along the way. From friendships, to a brotherhood, to everything else, I feel so blessed that I've been brought here, to NW Indiana, to come into the lives of those around me. For as I've passed through the campuses of Bethel and Notre Dame, and as I've rooted myself in at Grace Church of Granger, every relationship has left me with something that I'd not had before. I am truly a changed man, and I will be different tomorrow than I am as I write now.
The final emotion I want to mention is the longest to explain. As I sit here at my table, working on my laptop, listening to David Crowder, I am flooded with anticipation. Not just a little bit. I'm FLOODED!!! Now, that seems pretty obvious that I'd be anticipating our game on Saturday, but it's so much more than this game. The realization that I won't put on that Blue Jersey again has me anticipating everything from the last few games to starting school again, finding love, and living life! I mean, come on! The end of this chapter could be the sweetest ending I've ever read. But more than that, it could be the most exciting start to a chapter ever written. Why? Because from here, where do we go? Myself, I'll be in the Bend for at least six months, working at Grace, but that could turn into a long-term thing (please God?). In step with that, I'll be going back to seminary here sometime, either part time or full time, depending on the work situation. In the midst of all of this, I feel God preparing me for a relationship again. Not trying to seek or anything, but I feel my heart being strengthened and convicted in areas that haven't been addressed in a long time (Jokingly, I'm not thrilled...I'll explain another day). God's got something in store for me, and the end of this chapter of my life is causing me to face up to just how BIG it could be. Oh man, I'm jacked up. God, I give you all I am. Take me and use me how you see fit.
Sorry for getting off on that tangent, but seriously, get excited! Maybe you're in the middle of a chapter with life right now, but God still has some awesome stuff planned. Tune in! Okay, gonna wipe the tears and clean the apartment.
Feel the Flood,
Bobby
posted by Bobby at 6:04 PM
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